the first draft

Kyle Norris, a reporter and producer for Michigan Radio, visited the Sound and Story class and she listened to work made by my classmates. She also responded to my first draft for the audio portrait.





This was my first attempt at shaping the final portrait of Brenda and Mrs. Johnston.

I wrote this as a brief description for the Michigan Theater screening. Brenda cares for her 99-year-old friend Mrs. Johnston almost every evening. This nonfictional audio portrait reveals their intimate companionship and the challenge of transitioning from an independent to dependent way of life.

These are the images I want listeners to learn. It can be difficult to become dependent on others and the importance of companionship during these moments. Of course I also want to let everyone know how amazing Brenda and Mrs. Johnston. They allowed me to step into their lives at these intimate moments and grow in a friendship with both of them. Not only is their friendship quite special, but also all their families friendship, the Wiley's and the Johnston's.

Kyle Norris gave great advice on the first draft. There is really no story in this draft, although there are great moments. I believe she described a story as someone doing something for a reason and there was no tape in the draft describing the importance of their companionship. Norris said to think of a focus statement for your work and then try to support it with moments that possibly prove it. She also highly recommended thinking about what you want a listener to learn from the work.